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12-9-1996
Okay, I had a presentation to give for my "day job." This presentation was at a client's site.
I showed up around 7:45, nice 'n early (a change). The snow plow has plowed the snow from each parking isle up into a big pile at the end. It takes up roughly one parking spot from each isle.
I was fortunate enough to discover this large pile of snow on a few other visits to this building. So, I drove in, got myself aimed, dropped into 4x4, and then backed up.. right up into and on top of the snow bank. Sure, it looked funny, all cocked to one side (the plow man can't even make leveled off snow piles), but it gave me a good chance to see my suspension at full compression on one side. Those 31" meats look *close*.
Anyhow, I thought it was a great parking job, and if no one else felt like parking in the snow bank, well.. I was taking up one less "regular" parking spot (you can never find a place to park, and hey.. not everyone can drive a Scout!)
At about 8:40am, just 20 minutes before my presentation, I needed to run back to the office to grab something.. so they send me (I drive a Scout, remember? :-) ). I find a nice white paper under my windshield wipers saying something to the effect of "This is not a parking spot, this is a snowbank. There are plenty of other places to park. We have seen you do this before. If there is a scratch on that car, I will turn you into the police". "that car" referred to the vehicle parked next to me, on flat ground. A simple "Please do not park here" would have been enough, but this just pissed me off. It most certainly *is* a parking spot, there were two yellow lines marking it off before they filled the spot in with snow. I *know* what a snowbank is, and that is why I parked there. Then this anonymous person goes on to insult my driving ability and sense of responsibility.
I fumed the whole way back to the office, and was still pissed when I made it back to the parking lot. So now, I'm pissed off, I have 10 minutes to finish setting up for my presentation, and someone doesn't want me to park on the snow bank.. Guess what? All of those "plenty" parking spaces did not exist. I started getting more pissed, started flying up and down the parking lot rows trying to find a place. Eventually, I came back to a small opening, hwere a Ford pickup and some car had illegally parked.. each were over a yellow line, leaving a VERY tight spot in between, that thus far no one had claimed. Well, this must be the "plenty" spots that person was talking about.. so again, I straightened it out, and edged my way inbetween. Then I crawled out the rear hatch. I had about 1" on either side of me.
Then I dropped my own note in the snowbank I had originally parked in, saying something like, "First off, this *is* a parking spot, complete with yellow lines designating it's boundaries. Please do not insult my driving abilities. If I were to ever touch a car, *I* would be the first person to report it to the police. Second, if you vandalize my truck again by placing your graffiti / litter on my vehicle, I will turn YOU into the police".
That said, I stormed into the building, just in time for the presentation.. 10 minutes of *MY* time wasted because someone doesn't like the fact that *I* drive a Scout, and *I* found a place to park, right next to the door. Hey, if I drove a GEO, I would find a place to park in no-man's land, too (and at -30, it's a LOOOONG walk)..
Well, my presentation is over, I'm cleaning up. I grab my coat.. There's a note on it to see someone down the hall. Hmmm.. I don't think it's Fan mail, and I don't know someone named XXXX (names changed to protect the client's employees)
I wander down, and this nice woman is kind enough to inform me that my vehicle had slid after parking in the snow bank (the tire marks show no indication). She also mentioned that she had received several complaints about my driving in the parking lot and excessive speed. The police department and the State General Services had been notified. Also, while I may have had the option of crawling out my rear hatch (In my damn white collar shirt, suspenders, slacks, and noose.. er tie), the lady parked next to me did not have that option. (Actually, the car on my left had plenty of room on her left.. she was half in my spot. The Ford on my right was part in my spot, and the other side (passenger) opened into one of those forbidden snow-bank parking spots.. where is the problem here?). So, some lady went out and moved her car a few inches over, so that I could use my doors to get in. How nice of her. Thank you very much.
So, Ok, I'm still pissed and ready for a fight, but my cooler side prevailed.. it would not do, politically, for this 20 year "wiz-kid" to be placed on the black-list at our primary client's building.
I carry my stuff out to my Scout, and what should I see.. but a sticky note on my window, saying "If there's so much as a nick in my car, you are in deep do-do!". Now I'm *really* pissed. So, I scrawled "You're lucky, there are no new dents in MY car." and stuck it back on the lady's window.
Do people really think I'm that ignorant? I know my vehicle better than anyone else. I know how to get in and out of tight places (I used to park my Chevy Luv in some interesting spots). The lady did not understand, that the only way there would be new dents in her precious car, was if I got pissed off enough to purposefully put them there. Lucky for her, my cooler side prevailed once again. I was tempted to ding her door, then backup, put my front bumper to her imported rear bumper, and give her a shove into the next car..
Why is it my truck invokes fear in these people? Can they not understand I am a "good" person? Do they fear my "real" truck, which is deficient in chrome, doesnt' have a snazzy paintjob, lacks any ground effects, has tires that are more than 1" from the wheels? I think they're jealous. The other thing that really bugs me.. What are these !@#$% Employees doing with their time at work, that they can monitor their vehicles in the parking lot, waiting to see if someone is going to park next to them, and possibly nick their car? Do we pay these people too much? They obviously think they drive a very expensive car.. and they obviously have too much time on their hands, and not enough work.
But, I think I'm done with my ranting.. maybe next time I'll talk about what I think of the Helena Police Department and their harassment of teenage drivers..
*sigh* Thanks for letting me vent..
-Tom